Friday, June 17, 2011

Expecting again... for good this time?

Life with three little ones is wonderful... looking into each of their faces every day is like looking into the face of Christ. Naturally, I can't wait until we get to meet this new life growing within me. The children are thrilled that a new brother or sister is on the way. My son, of course, wants it to be a boy. My oldest daughter, of course, wants it to be a girl. But, wisely, my son has declared that we should think of both boy and girl names, just to be sure.

I'm having the oh-so-"wonderful" early pregnancy nausea and fatigue, made worse by the fact that I've been put on both oral progesterone and progesterone injections (two injections, twice a week... aye). But I'm comforted by the fact that I never had a chance to get to the early pregnancy symptoms with all three previous miscarriages. And given that I made it to at least 7 weeks without realizing I was pregnant and therefore without the extra progesterone, I'm thinking that maybe God wants this little one to stay.

I was in adoration last night and the tears just kept coming down my face. They were tears of joy, to be sure--at nothing in particular and yet at everything in particular. Or maybe it was just the fact that God was right before my eyes. Either way, it hit me that I haven't experienced the intensity of my pregnant moods in over two years, and it's time to walk this walk all over again. This is probably my most challenging pregnancy symptom, over the debilitating fatigue and the just plain yucky nausea. I would appreciate your prayers.

You know what's really amazing, though? That never before have I been late to finding out I was pregnant. I usually know at three and a half weeks. Well, not that, but the fact that God waited just enough time to let us know until we were settled in the new office, having my friends helping me with the veils. I think God probably knew that, had I found out before that, I would have freaked out and given it all up, a la "I can't do it--I'm done!" So He waited. And now, I have more time to devote to my kids and more time to get much-needed rest, thanks to putting it all in His hands and letting Him lead us to getting the business out of the house and into the perfect office... with help from others.

God's plans are perfect, and He shows us so, over and over again. Boy, am I looking forward to seeing Him face to face.

Longing for God,

The Catholic Wife

1 comment:

  1. I am so glad I found your blog! Like you my husband and I have suffered the loss of a child. We were almost full term. Here is a link to our birth story
    http://facesofloss.com/2010/10/377.html
    Also, I want to thank you for helping me with all of the wonderful information that you have on veiling. It has really allowed me to come to an understanding of my own personal feelings as to why I have such a yearning to begin.

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